There are
hundreds of ways of getting the number. Unfortunately, most guys think that they are the man if they can get a girl's number.
It may look really cool to your friends if you can get lots of numbers, but the truth is that numbers aren't real relationships.
Women give out their numbers for a variety of reasons. To get rid of you, to give them an ego boost, to look desirable in
front of other men and their friends, to play with you, to have you keep calling until one day maybe they might be bored and
decide to see you again, and maybe even because they want you to call them back. So, realize that the game isn't over after
you get the number. There are two philosophies when it comes to getting numbers. In fact, I believe there are two philosophies
when it comes to game. I don't believe either are wrong or better than the other, so I will explain both and tell you the
pros and cons.
Philosophy one: The numbers game.Some players are number collectors. They literally have
books filled with women's numbers. When they pick up girls, they are solely focused on getting the number so they can try
to schedule a date alone.
Pros: You meet a lot of women! You also get terrific skill at opening and confidence
building with each number you receive. You become so comfortable with rejection, that it no longer phases you because after
all, it's a numbers game and they can take you or leave you. You are never short of girls to call.
Cons: Most
of the women you call will be flakes. Most of the women that do call you back will flake out on the first date. You rarely
ever get practice at qualifying and comfort building because you always go straight for the number. You may meet a lot of
crazies and waste a lot of time with women who weren't prescreened. You may lose the emotional closeness and connection that
basic human beings have and may start seeing women as numbers. You may become a "social robot".
Philosophy two:
Solid game.Some players feel that it's better to go as far as you can with the woman while you are there with
her in order to keep her from flaking on you. The more you build comfort and attraction with a woman the same day you meet
her, the more likely she will meet up with you again. Getting numbers isn't successful to a man who plays solid game.
Pros:
All of the phone numbers you have are numbers of women who were prescreened and have the qualities you look for in women.
Most of the women you call will call you back and see you again. You connect with a lot of people and gain excellent skill
at gaining rapport quickly.
Cons:Requires a lot of investment in time spent gaming each woman. You may only
wind up with at most two numbers in one night, sometimes with none. You can become extremely frustrated when a woman flakes
on you and take rejection personally, especially if you invested four hours of conversation with her. If there are many woman
in a venue that you want to meet, you won't be comfortable trying to get all of their numbers and will stick to one all night.
In
my opinion, it is best to practice both skill sets. In the early stages of your practicing, go numbers game. You need the
practice of opening and getting the number. Getting comfortable with rejection and absorbing yourself in the game will help
you grow tremendously. After you become pretty sufficient at opening and getting numbers, ease away from it. Begin screening
women and gaming one woman at the venue you are at if you really like her. Find a happy medium between the two. You will know
when you are there. Only field experience will tell you where a good place for you is.
Keep it real.
Jester,
MDC Executive Coach
Do you have any questions, success stories, or insights that you'd
like to see in this newsletter? Keep it brief, email them to jester@miamidatingcoach.com and one of our coaches will answer them personally. Do not reply to
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