It is important to note that the rules of attraction apply throughout the entire relationship. The game is never over, it’s just that in the later stages, when you are bonding with a woman, attraction isn’t the focus.
Kino escalation happens when you make a move, when you hold a girl’s hand, touch her face, or kiss her.
Remember: Do not escalate kino like you are trying to get her to have sex as quickly as possible.
Relax guys. This telegraphs way too much interest and puts her in the position of being the prize.
Remember to add the previously discussed concept of push/pull theory. With each step, always have some kind of push when you pull her in with this escalation. If you are always pulling and never pushing her away, she will become accustomed to resisting your advances and expecting them to come, thereby making you chase her and making yourself predictable. She will not find this attractive, trust me. This is the point where whatever attraction you had with her before starts to die and loses interest.
The best time to kino escalate is when she does something to earn it or when you “push her.” Pushing creates this vacuum of tension between you two and is very exciting for her. The kino is her reward (pull) for chasing you. But you never want to give her full validation, nor do you want to shut her out completely. That’s what sexual tension is.
Here are some good examples of proper kino escalation:
Juan: Are you a good kisser?
HB: Uh, yeah, of course, duh!
Juan: If you were in a kissing class, what grade would the teacher give you?
HB: A+!
Juan: No way, you probably have no idea how to kiss.
HB: Yeah I do!
Juan: Show me then. (They start making out, then Juan pushes her off.) I guess you’re okay. (Juan gives a playful smile.)
To properly execute kino escalation, you must first establish some kind of touch. Maybe poke her or touch her shoulder. Something small at first. Work your way to more intense kino such as hand holding, cuddling, and sitting in your lap. Calibrate. Don’t be a passive either. Be aggressive and take the initiative.
You should attempt kino escalation in an unnatural way. After the kino reward her with praise. If you aren’t setting it up and you are just going for kino, it can still work, but make sure you end the touching before she does. You always should be the one to start and stop. If you feel she is tensing up when you kino her, throw her hand away and tease her. This will all come with experience.
Dan Silverman,
MDC Executive Dating Coach