Guess what? Miami Dating Coach is now hosting free speed dating events at the Eleven Leprechauns in Coconut Grove. In light of the first ever speed dating event last weekend, I wrote a speed dating do’s and don’ts sheet for anyone interested in attending a speed dating event. Enjoy!
Don’t Brag - Confidence is the ultimate aphrodisiac for women, but if all you do is show off and brag about yourself, it screams insecurity. In a speed dating scenario, the best way to let her know about your positive traits is to bait her into asking you about it, or make it almost a side note to the conversation rather than to just start listing your accomplishments like a salesman.
Lean Back - Neediness and insecurity are the biggest turnoffs to women. By leaning back instead of leaning in while talking to a woman during your speed date, you demonstrate non-neediness. If you’re constantly pecking into her, she’ll think you want her too much, which is never good because women need a challenge.
Smile - Speed dating is not supposed to be serious. A smile is sometimes all that is needed to make a woman want to see you again. It shows friendliness and comfortability.
Don’t Interview Her - She is not applying for a job and neither are you. Instead of qualifying each other, try to find similarities and common interests which could lead to a second date.
Communicate Emotionally - The way you game women is by making them feel emotions. It’s a proven fact that the more emotions you can make a woman feel when she is around you, the more attracted she will be. Don’t state facts or debate when you talk to her during your speed date. That is too logical. Instead, tell stories, tease her, be playful, make funny observations, and build a connection.
If You’re Not Attracted, Be Pleasant - If you’re with a woman you’d rather not be sitting with, the least you could do is be pleasant. Most people come with friends to their speed dating events, and if the woman you happen to like is friends with a woman you were rude to during speed dating, she’ll let her know.
Don’t Be Negative - There is nothing that could kill a speed date worse than negativity. Don’t complain, don’t talk down about yourself, don’t talk trash about the other speed daters. Keep the conversation positive and fun.
Keep Eye Contact - Eye contact is a powerful way to build rapid sexual connection during your speed date. Don’t look around the room at other speed daters while you are talking. Keep eye contact while talking to your date, but don’t stare. Staring can be really creepy.
Compliment - Compliments will take you far. Just don’t be a suck up. Compliment on her qualities that you genuinely like because women are great at seeing through men’s BS.
Sample Questions for Men to Break the Ice - What did you want to grow up to be when you were little? Were you a boy band groupie in high school? If you had one wish, what would it be besides me? Where do you see yourself in ten years from now? (Ask different forms of these types of questions. The idea is to engage her emotionally.)
Hope these nuggets of advice snag you a date or two at your speed dating event. Good luck!
Dan Silverman,
MDC Executive Dating Coach