I have the pleasure of introducing one of my good friends, Iceman. He is what the community calls a natural. He has his own version of the way he does things that encompasses everything we have learned so far. He is particularly masterful at conversational rapport and making girls fall for him. I’ve asked him to tell us about it. Without further ado, here is Iceman…
Iceman
To begin, I only got into this whole “game” thing to improve my approach and pickup game. Needless to say, it worked like a mofo. I no longer have too many problems getting a girl’s number/e-mail/myspace if I decide that I want it. So basically, I got over my main sticking point. Since most of you guys seem to be past that, let’s move on to Jester’s question about phone game and flakiness.
First thing I have to say is that humor is by far the world’s greatest aphrodisiac. If you keep her laughing, she’s yours. When I get in contact with a girl, I focus very heavily on keeping her smiling and making sure she’s enjoying the conversation. If you’re boring, you lose. Girls have one major fear they never talk about. They are terrified of being bored. And, believe it or not, they will fuck the wrong guy if it keeps them busy enough to forget how mind-numbingly dull their life is. So, in order to take advantage of this, you have to be one funny son of a bitch. That doesn’t mean you have to crack jokes constantly or be immature and never serious. It just means that you have to think you’re funny and let them come along for the ride. Remember, when you call a girl, it’s because you want to see if they’re good enough for you. If they pass your tests, then you decide to ask them out to continue the interview. Girls need to get the impression that you’re grilling them and testing out how fun they can be. We all know that. In my opinion, the best way to go about giving her that impression is to make her feel like you’re a really fun guy who wants to make sure she can keep up with you. That is a big part of qualifying.
So, let’s review my first phone call to a girl. Usually, I try to keep it kind of short. Maybe a half hour tops. I always call in the early evening, maybe around eight or so. I always tell them that I just got home from someplace and I was about to do something but wanted to call them first. This lets them know that it’s no big deal for me to call a chick. I want to communicate to them that I’m between chores and don’t really have anything better to do than to call them to see if I think they’re even cool enough to call again later. I usually tell them that I just got back from the gym or work, and that I was about to start cooking or getting ready to go out. (Because, of course, I have way more friends than she does). This lets them know that I can’t talk forever, but I have enough time to enjoy a light-hearted chat. They need to feel like calling them was a whim, not something you’ve been planning out all day… you liar! I always ask lots of questions and then crack little jokes about (or lightly poke fun at) their answers. The key is to always be smiling when you’re talking. Style was right. They can hear it when you’re smiling, and they need to.
Here’s the clincher: you have to say things like “Good answer!” or (in a funny/sarcastic tone) “I don’t know… I may be too much for you/you may too much for me/I’m not really into that, but I’m willing to try new things/blah blah blah”. They need to know that you’re not afraid of letting this opportunity pass you by because you meet girls every day, and you’re not easily impressed. Sometimes I come right out and say it. “So what’s your story? What are you into? Come on, dazzle me!” They love that cocky shit… at first. Once they’re comfortable talking to you and laughing at your jokes regularly. Get off the phone! Tell them straight up: “You seem like a pretty cool girl” or “It sounds like you’ve got a pretty decent head on your shoulders” followed by “I think I’d like to talk to you again soon”. Then say you’ve gotta get in the shower or get back to your cooking (by the way, girl, did I mention I can cook? haha) Then hit the eject button and bail. You have to leave them smiling and laughing. That way, they’ll think about you all the next day and start waiting for your next call. Why? Because you’re fun to talk to.
Girls always get way ahead of themselves when it comes to thinking about boys. Trust me… if you’re charming enough, they’ll start looking through Bride Magazine. They’ve been doing this shit since they were 4 years old… seriously. Next time you call them make it two days later. Don’t wait too long. That makes you seem flaky and they don’t like that either. Turn on the sweetness along with the humor. They’ll melt so quick that they’ll be begging you to ask them to dinner. Of course, I like to start with a Sunday lunch. It feels more relaxed and you can spend plenty of time just walking and talking afterwards if things go well. Dinner feels a little too serious. Remember, if you’re funny and confident, and then sweet; their panties will drop faster than you can say, “Let me grab a condom.” Always remember, guys, nobody will like you if you don’t like yourself first. You are your only representative… sell yourself.
Oh, and if they get flaky… fuck ‘em. None of us have time for that bullshit. Maybe you can send them a text message or e-mail a few weeks later to test the waters, but trust me, if she likes you she will pick up that phone or at least call you back. If not, either your original pickup or first phone call didn’t do the trick. Cut your losses and move on. She isn’t worth worrying about.
Guys, I hope this is enough. If you have any more questions, you can always e-mail or call Jester.
-ICEMAN-
My Comments
Thanks for your article, Iceman. Read that again! Notice in the entire article a main theme is that he is qualifying the girl to see if he wants to see them again, but at the same time he uses humor and his endless blabbery to make them laugh and get their guard down while he controls the frame of qualifying them. Don’t be fooled by thinking that when he says being sweet to them means being a suckup. I think what he means by sweet means that they finally won him over and he’s nice on his own terms and eventually does sweet things to them that only Bubba the jailman does to arrested police officers.
Dan Silverman,
MDC Executive Coach
“I love a guy that makes me laugh.”
-Anonymous-